So if we leave at 2AM for a 12 hour trip, add in plenty of time for frequent stops, say like 2 hours, then we should arrive at our hotel at 4 PM, a good 2 1/2 hours before the rehearsal dinner. Very reasonable, right? That even gives us two hours of slack for mishaps.
That. Was. The. Plan.
We rolled out of Sarah and Adam's around 2:15. Getting settled into my little nook in the van and trying to fall back asleep something dawned on me. I remember Halle texting me on her way there when she hit the time change into Georgia. Oh Crap! We forgot there was a time change. And not to our advantage either. Going from Central to Eastern time would make us lose an hour. Shoot, four adults, somewhat smart, and none of us remembered the time change. Oops. Well, no biggie, right? We've allotted ourselves plenty of time so it's going to be ok. No need to stress.
We're cruising along, got our Waffle House in us, on our way. We're partway through Alabama. All of a sudden everyone is exiting the freeway. Why is everyone exiting? Who knows, but they are. Ok, we're thinking, just a little detour. We will ride the feeder for a bit and then get on the highway again after we've passed the obstacle.
Nope.
There is no quick detour. There is a huge body of water to cross, and the only bridge to cross it is what's shut down. We don't know that at this point, though. There isn't a feeder, so Brian tries to cut over to a road that looks like it runs parallel to the highway. It looks promising. We go on that road for a few miles, and then it ends! Dang. Now we have to turn around and go right back to where we started. Once we backtrack we see a construction worker. You know, uh-hmmm, the one who waved us down the first time we passed, trying to warn us to not go that way. He gave us directions on how to bypass the bridge and get back to the highway. I guess he was getting back at us for not listening to him the first time because he gave us jacked up directions. About thirty miles into our detour attempt #2 Brian is preoccupied with navigation and hits a speed trap. He gets pulled over.
The cop seems nice enough, tells us he will give us directions after he runs Brian's license and plates. Brian is getting antsy, though, because we are now at a point where we are running late. The cop is taking his sweet time and even spends five minutes giving directions to some ladies who are also lost. Brian is sure he's going to get off with a warning and be on his way because the officer gave no indication that Brian is getting a ticket and he wasn't going very much over the speed limit. He also knows that we are lost and running late. Surely he understands the misfortune of us poor out-of-towners....
After fifteen minutes the cop finally returns, with a ticket. Brian is MAD. Remember he's only had two hours of sleep and at this point he's been driving for about 8 hours. The cop goes over the citation with Brian. He then, as promised, hands Brian a paper with handwritten directions to get us back on track. The cop starts to go over the directions with Brian. Brian snatches the paper, fuming, and tells the cop, "I really don't want to talk to you right now," and rolls up his window!!!
I thought for sure Brian would be in trouble, but the cop just waved us on. As we turn around and pass the cop again on the highway Brian starts rolling down his window. "Brian! Brian! Don't you dare flip off the cop!" That's me yelling at Brian because I know he's really pissed, and I'd met my husband before that day. I'm thinking, oh no, we're never going to end up in Georgia because Brian is going to jail for obscenities! Brian changes his mind at the last second, thankfully, and doesn't give him the finger. Thank goodness.
At this point we are all stressed because of our delays, Brian is mad because he got a ticket, and I'm mad at Brian for not keeping his temper in check. Then Adam chimes, "I know this has been a bad road-trip, but it's going to make for a great blog later!" We all laugh 'cause it's true.
The route we were on per the construction worker, would have taken us 2-3 hours out of the way, according to the policeman. So we backtrack, (again) this time thirty minutes, just to get back to our starting point, again. We then take the recommended detour to I-10, which takes an hour.
Then we hit traffic. Sigh. Sarah and I are putting makeup on in the car because there will be no time to get ready once we arrive at the hotel.
We finally roll into the Holiday Inn at about 6:15. A room-booking complication arises, which takes another few minutes. I give Jack a Mexican shower and change him in the hallway. Then I turbo change myself and Arden.
We make it to the rehearsal dinner, thirty minutes late, but make it nonetheless.
After fifteen hours in the car the first item of business is a large glass of wine. :)
The next day, after Brian had cooled down, Adam and Sarah presented Brian with a souvenir mug to forever remember our eventful trip and his favorite Alabaman cop. :) |